Book Addict 1 (Book-A-Holics Anonymous)
Scene 1, Alcoholics Anonymous
Cassie: Hello, everyone, this is the regular Thursday meeting of the E-Street Alcoholics
Anonomous. We have a new member this week, his name is Don. Tell us about yourself, Don.
Don: Hello, my name is Don,￼ and I am a book-a-holic.
Cassie: What? ￼ Did you say that you are a book-a-holic?
Gretta: Wait, let him speak. I used to have that problem myself.
Don: I am addicted to reading books. Part of the second floor of my home collapsed
from the weight and I was almost killed. ￼ Too many books can be as dangerous as to
Mel: Wow, I didn't realize that an addiction to books was that dangerous.
Don: After that, I thought that I found a solution to my problem.
Gretta: Let me guess. ￼ You purchased a Kindle Book reader from Amazon.
Don: Yes, how did you know?
Gretta: Well, I did the same thing myself.
Don: I only red more books because now they were cheaper. The less that Amazon
charges, the more we book-a-holics buy.
Gretta: I know, it is enough to drive one to drink.
Don: So, what did you do to solve the book addiction? Did it really drive you to drink?
Gretta: Well, my situation did drive me to drink but then I found a method to deal with
the book problem. Now I come here to help me stay off of alcohol.
Don: What did you do to solve the book addiction? For me, it involves buying books
and only reading the first third or so. I buy much more than I can read.
Gretta: I got a chip implanted in my brain so that I could read faster and another chip
so that I could absorb all of the books that I had purchased.
Don: Wow. that sounds like a very good solution.
Gretta: Yes. I am a lawyer and with these chips in my brain, they made me a senior
partner at the law firm. I memorize briefs and can depose witnesses without looking at
Don: Neat. Where do I go to get these chips installed in my brain?
Gretta: Well, we are disrupting an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting. Let me tell you later,
after the meeting.
End of Scene 1 Alcoholics Anonymous
Scene 2: Chips Galore
Don: So, now that the rest of them are gone, tell me how I can go about getting a chip
implanted to help me read books faster.
Gretta: Let me show you how the chips go in first. This is my bedroom over here.
Don: So, why don't￼ they store your information in the cloud?
Gretta: Next years version will do exactly that. The batteries are stored in my private
parts and have to be removed before making love. I don't know where they put the
batteries in men.
Don: Where do I go to have the implant?
Gretta: There is a doctor in Belize and another one in Indonesia. You need to give
them a password...it is all hush hush.
Don: I see, may I see your batteries?